I'm at work and I'm about to cry. I don't want to cry, can you say something funny?
ONE TIME AT SCHOOL LET ME REMIND YOU I GO TO AN ALL GIRLS CATHOLIC HIGH SCHOOL SO THEY ALL WEAR SHOIRT ASS SKIRTS OKAY SO ONE TIME THIS GIRL LIKE TRIPPED AND HER SKIRT FLEW UP AND MY FRIEND WAS LIKE TIFFANH GO FUCKING HELP HER UP AND I WAS LIKE PARALYZED STARING AT HER ASS AND THEN MY FRIEND WAS LIKE FUCKING SHIT TIFFANY YOU USELESS LESBIAN AND SHE LITERALLY HIT ME WITH A BIBLE AND I HAVE NO REGRETS NONE
This kills me every time
"TIFFANY YOU USELESS LESBIAN"
I could have drawn something more environmental for Earth Day but nah
i want to take baths with you and hold your dumb hand and rent movies and watch those movies in your bed in our underwear at like 3 in the morning and i want to kiss your stupid face and cook you food and maybe fuck 7 times a night idnno
Gravity shift! [video]
THIS IS SO COOL
City Council is re-calibrating the gravity of the city today. Citizens are warned to anticipate sudden gravity shifts and stay near objects which can be grabbed onto in the event of a shift. And now, the weather.
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He did this to himself. Then looked at me with sad eyes because I was to busy laughing to help him.